Never stop dreaming and believing

Hello there,

I know I was inactive for more than a year, but it’s only due to my personality and my health problems – vegetative dystonia. All this time I was struggling, but all in all I feel better now, but anyway it’s still a long way to go to recover fully. I don’t want to think about what I went through, but what I want to achieve and do in my further life.

When You have almost none close person You fully trust, it’s sometimes hard to live, but I do believe in God and my dreams. When im ready to break-down, I return to my dreams and refill my motivation.

I am using pharmaceutical drugs and psychotherapy on my recovery process and I feel a little bit better now, less panic attacks and more inspiring thoughts will bring me back on the track.

I want to say “thank’s” to everyone here on WordPress who inspired me and are sending me good thoughts and wishes.  Appreciate all of them. I would like to hear something about You, dear reader. What have you achieved during last year and what are your aims for this year. Share on the comment section down below and achieve them together.


Between a struggle and living


I was thinking the headline of my topic for a while and decided to stick with this one.
I haven’t published my post with three awards I have been nominated for just because headline says it all. I hope I will post that somewhen later, but anyway thank’s for nominations.

While not posting everyday or even once in a week doesn’t mean that my intentions have changed, it means that I have been thinking a lot. Especially last two weeks while I’m struggling with some kind of panic attack. I got accustomed with these attacks, but this one seems longer than those before and it makes me feel as a crap.
I decided to take a private lessons and help those kids to understand school subjects better, but now I have lost myself and belief in myself. No need to say that I have stopped taking lessons.

I started to feel sick on one evening and thought it’s just a cold, will sleep and everything will be okey, but no.. It’s hard to watch on food especially after I have had a meal, just because I’m human and I can be sometimes hungry, too. After that I cannot watch on food and enjoy social life, just because I’m afraid of myself and worried I could fall to the ground from sickness.. If You will type in google “emetophobia” then You will understand..
I think it’s all because of stress, but otherwise I don’t know what happens. I don’t feel like me, but hopefully healing massages will help me to find my way through these obstacles. I have a lot to do for others and need to help them and don’t want to stop this right now.

What’s the point of this topic? This is just a topic of my thoughts and conclusions. And the conclusion is that You should try to understand especially Your loved ones whenever they say they feel bad. You should say to him/her that everything will be more than OK, even if You are not sure, but he or she should not see doubts in Your eyes. It’s right time to turn to Your loved ones and say You truly love them, because You don’t know what will be tommorow. It’s not a shame to die tommorow, it’s a shame to die and understand You haven’t done all You could for Your loved ones. I wish I had enough power to do my best for others. But need to continue.. to believe.. again.


Peace and love..

From collapse of Anorexia to University

Hello everyone!

It’s been a while since I published my last post, this time was fillled with a lot of thoughts about my future, how can I improve the quality of life for others and what should I do to make that happen.

Today I want to share with You one story I found pretty similar as mine.. As far as I think it’s almost impossible to find the story same as mine, I find this pretty close..

It’s Katie’s story.. She is 21 now and she is studying Creative Writing at Cumbria University. This is something great, but everything was not before she started to study.
She also struggled with anorexia when she was 14. She was the only girl in the class of four where three of them were hormone-raging teen boys.
Stress multiplied in her life when her parents told their marriage was in trouble.

She found that almost nothing is right in her life and hoped that losing some weight and improving fitness would make things about to change. She assumed that thin people have amazing lives and she wanted that one for herself as well.

She cut out fats, carbs and dairy and lived on rice cakes, apples and lettuce. She became addicted. “Nothing mattered more than satisfying the mystery voice’s need for weight loss and perfection.


Her weight dropped from 8.5st to under fell out,  skin cracked and bled, bones ached and her periods stopped. “But I still didn’t believe I was thin enough. When I looked in the mirror, a mound of blubber stared back.”

Eventually, she collapsed and ended up in hospital after having a minor heart attack while riding a bike. She was admitted to a psychiatric ward in a hospital in Middlesbrough, where where she stayed for the next nine months. After that – she started to eat one again, but her recovery was slow. Also as mine actually was. She received a lot of support from her family.
She have had a couple of relapses, but five years on she is fully recovered, with few long-lasting effects. Also her periods have come back so she can have children. And this is amazing in my opinion, because this experienced and awesome lady will be awesome mother even just because she experienced problem which is left in a shadow for a lot of times… A problem, from which suffer around 3% of population.

“Aim to live every day as though it’s your last and not submit to anorexia. Try to defeat anorexia before it defeats you. Always remember that help is out there.” – Katie

Comment from me: Katie’ s story is quite inspiring, I’m glad she can have kids now and she is able to live better life even those long-lasting effects no one who haven’t suffered from anorexia won’t understand. Keep going, Katie! 🙂

Make the best from Your day, dear reader! Trust Yourself that You can beat whatever You desire and You can help and inspire a lot of others. Don’t forget that.

How to improve our decisions?

Hello everyone!

Yesterday I found an article about our brains and how actually the lottery messes with our heads and how to take control over it and apply for Your life in useful way.

Have You ever thought of being rich? Me, too. And that’s why people buy lottery tickets even when the odds are quite terrible. For example, the odds of winning Powerball went one in 293 million. Sounds possible? As one website says:
Humans, it turns out, can’t deal well with odds that are very small. Instead, we rely on something else — whether we can picture the outcome. If we can see it in our mind, we think it’s more likely. If we can’t picture it, we think it’s unlikely.

You can clearly imagine those 10 luxury cars in Your garage, that cottage with golden balcony near ocean. This is not so hard to do, as a result You are making Your way to the kiosk where You are still dreaming about Your future house and You buy 5.. maybe 10 tickets. As a result lottery messes with Your head. In this case – most of times You will lose..

Another example.. People stress about airline crashes far more than is rational, because whenever one happens, they’re on the news. The chance of dying on your flight may be one in five million but the image of an airline crash is easy to bring to mind.


But You can turn this trick from the opposite side.. Try to imagine something not always based only on feelings, but also connect Your mind. Probably, saying no to that “something” in Your mind. Another example.. You would like to buy a lot of cigarettes, because they are cheaper and You imagine how You will smoke them for next 2 weeks, but in our case try to visualise throwing them away in Your mind, so You probably will be less willing to smoke. Visualise how could You spend Your money better.. another opportunity.

Or next time you’re thinking about buying a lotto ticket, visualise scrunching up your ticket in disappointment. It could save you a bunch of money.
With this all I wanted to say that not always people should act like a loser and at the end of the event be that one. Everyone can visualise. All You need is a bit of time and commitment. Commitment – You won’t lose money on lottery tickets, but You will achieve Your dreams of golden cottage in a more realistic way than trying to beat the odds of winning Powerball. It’s up to You.

P.S. I’m planning on going to the Sweden and study there (it’s just an idea here, but I will apply and see If I will get accepted) and that’s why I wanted to ask You, dear reader, maybe You know someone from Sweden (city Örebro) who could offer a room for a few months? Of course I can ask that university for dorm as well, but I hope to find a bit cheaper variant (hopefully cheaper). Would appreciate if You could share this or think about someone from Your friends list or just someone You know is living there. Anyway, thank’s a lot.

Choose Your words wisely

Hello everyone,

We are now in 2016 and that means we continue to be great and to behave great.

Today I would like to pay Your attention on what You are saying in daily routine and how can it affect others.


This is my friend Marc. He was also suffering from anorexia before a few years. He suffered from childhood bullying and as a result phobia appeared of panic attacks when confronted with meal.
Marc says: “When I was 14 I also was tormented by bullies who called me fat. As a result, I got incredibly skinny.”
In this case – his family supported him a lot. I’m glad he has such an amazing parents and I can say that he is almost fine today and I guess happy as well. Why I’m so glad? Because there’s still a lot of stigma and misunderstanding because the majority of eating disorders occur in females and men are ashamed to come forward and admit they have a problem.
And I agree. Because when I was facing this, I felt that no one actually knew what to do. Plus I had not a common features and it made it totally unique and difficult to cure.

But what I wanted to say is that You should think about what You are saying in each situation. Your words can be as a deadly weapon, but at the same time Your words can help to recover someone. You are able to kill someone just by Your words and You are able to give another birthday for someone. In Marc’s case his family helped a lot, in my case that mysterious girl Sintija appeared and just by words in the letter motivated me.

Why would You need to say to someone that he or she is fat? You don’t know.. maybe that “You are fat” from Your mouth would be the very first words for that person he/she would hear for last two months about himself/herself.. Bullying someone is the same as being murderer.. because You actually are destroying that person. Would You like to be called, for example, fat cow? Think about this. I guess You don’t want to be called like this, so You need to accept that others are not willing to hear this one as well. Thank You!

The road to success: The 36 stratagems

Hello, everyone!

It’s nice to be here and do something from my heart to try to improve Your and maybe even Your friends life.

One day I decided to visit my lecturer at university so I went there and asked for something useful whether it’s a book or movie that could give me something useful for life and he replied that  I should check out 36 strata… Sorry, what? I asked for repeat and he replied one more time – the 36 Stratagems. That word “Stratagems” sounded wierd for the very first time I heard. When he said that 36 Stratagems discovered Chinese people, I thought it’s another nonsense from China. Like those clothes. You bring home those new jeans which You have bought with a hope that You have something different than “Made in China”, but You find out “damn, it’s from China again like every part of my collection”. Anyway, even clothes from China can be pretty great, but 36 Stratagems is something more than pretty. Let’s take a look.

The origin of the list is actually murky, but the first mention of it was as advice to a struggling general who lived somewhere in the Northern and Southern Dynasties period. The stratagems are traditionally divided into six groups, for the situations in which they are best used. Each group consists of six strategies. There are for around 16 blocks of Strategems, for example, Stratagem and cunning, Stratagem and wisdom, Stratagem and economics and so on.

Let’s go deeper. I have chosen for an example the Stratagem number four and it says: Awaiting at one’s ease the exhausted enemy. In other words, it means sitting it-out. Control the enemy and don’t let Yourself be controlled by them. You’re one step ahead and in top form You play Your game with Your exhausted opponent. Actually there is an e-book possible to find on Google and it gives You advanced information about history of each Stratagem, an example, description and risks.
For example, in this case the risk would be: waiting must not degenerate into missed opportunities.
When You put Your heart and soul into specific ventures, playing for the highest stakes, do not forget the Chinise proverb: “The praying mantis catches the cicada, but the titmouse is already lurking behind.”

Small businesses in particular should always take into consideration the fact that while they’re making a genuine effort, a powerful competitor is calmly awaiting his opportunity.


And this was a fast preview of only one of 36 Stratagems.
There are a lot more Stratagems like: “Killing with a borrowed knife”, “Beating the grass to startle the snakes” and “Catching the bandits by first catching the ringleader”.
And the interesting part about this is that You should think about where each of them could be applied. But with great examples and descriptions there it’s possible to do that successfully, my friend! It’s up to You whether You are going to check them out and find Your application for them or not in the New Year of 2016.

Thank’s a lot for Your attention and will see You somewhen.. At January it’s session for me at university and I won’t make a lot of topics, but I will keep looking for Yours for sure. By the way – I just bought a winter coat for that coldness outside – and it’s from China. Looks great, will see how it will be about wearing. See You and Happy New Year filled with love and success ! 🙂

Politeness pays off


It’s nice to share things which are important for me and this time it won’t be an exception.

Has anyone ever thought about politeness and its price? Could it be measured in dollars? It could be. But the main point about this story won’t be the money.

29 November was pretty lucky day for some man in Philippines. He is living in the US, but went back to visit his family. In the Philippines there is a national lottery and nobody had won the lottery since 15 May. The name of lucky man is keeping secret.

The father of three won 741m pesos or 17 m dollars. He would not win this if there won’t be a woman who rudely pushed in ahead of him. Of course as a gentleman he let her go ahead and after bought the winning ticket. After the victory he kept thinking: “How sad for that woman, she could have won the big prize if she had just been patient.” The winner beat odds of one in nearly 29m.

I think this man is absolutely enjoying process of buying and following those numbers. It’s not the fight for his life and he let the woman go, that shows not only good manners but the point is that You should be in balance with Yourself both internally and outwardly. And trust Yourself. Be confident.

That was the story of this man from Philippines. But I want to share another short story which I found while surfing in the net.. As we all know Christmas is almost ringing our doorbells and here in Latvia is being held a charity event when everyone is able to donate any amount of money in exchange of song You have to choose to be played on the radio station.
One little girl brought her money box to that radio station with the money she was collecting for a long time. She wanted to donate it and help kids with special needs even she is a kid by herself. This cute girl donated 10 euros and for an exchange she was able to choose two songs to be played on that radio station. I found this girl as an example with potential to show at the end what truly matters. Also there was a woman who donated 1000 euros. Thank You!

It’s such a nice feeling to know that there are people around You with great intentions and with unselfish attitude. That’s what I’m talking about all this post.

At the end of the topic I would like to wish You merry Christmas and what’s more important, wish You to take care of those who’s important for You and don’t forget to help unknown people as well. Oh, and reach Your goals with the “Winner’s attitude”, my friend.



The road to success: A Winner’s attitude

Hello, I’m glad to be here and share these important things to You.Thanks for those amazing comments on previous topics.

Last time I gave You an advise – think about what You love or at least what You are interested in. Whether You are already decided what You are passionate about or not – it’s not so important. You can decide tommorow – but as long as You won’t spend time thinking about what you love – nothing will happen (after reading  this topic I hope You will find the answer – why?), but You should start by finding out what You truly like and after that You can transfer Winner’s attitude to everyday’s life.
This is one of my favourite part – how to think like a Winner and also how to be that one. So let’s begin.

Actually there is only one rule that You must accept. If You want to be a Winner, then You need to make a promise. The promise to Never Ever Give Up. Make the promise to never quit what ever you’re into and what ever You choose to set out to finish the race. If You have found being a doctor as Your passion – great, do it. If You have found being a teacher as Your passion – well done! If Your dream is to collect 10 000 postages – go for it!

You will have a lot of challanges and failures You think are failures, but person who has Winner’s attitude would think differently. Failure in reality shouldn’t exist in Your mind – for the only time You truly fail is when You give up. With a Winner’s mind You don’t lose – You learn. As a result, You are now able to learn and grow constantly. Now I know – when I was at my lowest point – I was learning, not failing. Be open to ideas and suggestions from the right people to help get an advance in the game You are playing.

Why is it so important not to give up? Because You are the only one who is responsible for Your life. At my lowest point it was only up to myself. Sintija tried to motivate me, but the final decision was up to me. Your goals and dreams won’t  get up and come to You. You have to go and get them. One of my dreams is to find that mysterious girl Sintija and I am going for it now for about 6 years and I won’t quit this marathon. The second dream what I’m not going to abandon is about my own family once. But the real enemy that often holds us back is ourselves. It’s not the economy, neighbours or even friends. You should get out of Your own way to become successful. Right? There are many people who think one thing or another is impossible. Make that one like IM possible. People think they fail every day and they fail because they don’t think as a Winner. If they would think – they would say: „I’m learning constantly.”


I could discuss a lot more, but at the end of the topic I would like to say – Your success will come from the actions You actually take. Life doesn’t reward those with potential or those who feel they deserve it. Life rewards those who understand the simplest of truths – taking action. Roger Federer – amazing tennis player, isn’t brilliant just because he has potential, he is brilliant by taking action – in this case – playing tennis. You will have whatever You desire in life when Your reasons of taking actions become stronger than Your excuses.

Here is a big lesson for You: The world we live in is a world that is constantly evolving. If You are not evolving Your mind in a winning way, being open to change, accepting it and adapting to it, then You will be left behind. (Kevin Abdulrahman) I agree. How about You?

Have an amazing Winning month,


The road to success: Introduction

Dear reader,

Now You know a bit about myself, my experience and those difficulties I have made my way through. I strongly believe that I have a second chance to live and do it differently compared with the way I was living before.  As a result, I would like to improve Your, Your friends and everyone’s life by sharing series of articles by the title „the road to success”.
„The road to success” articles will include several topics, suggested by You, dear reader, or just based on my experience and vision how it should go to make You act like a Winner and what’s more important – be the one from that kind of it.

Do You know what success is? Is there one correct definition for it? Is there only one way success can be measured? I would say – no. I would like to say – success is when You are feeling happy, isn’t it? And that’s good for You! I think – life is a game. The more You know the rules, the more You can act like a Winner. These rules are quite simple, but they ask for You to pay enough attention. There are some simple rules and more advanced. Firstly, let’s have a look at those simpler rules.

It’s Your decision to become successful or not. It is only up to You. But if You ever decide or have decided already on being successful, then I’m glad You are here. None will help You to reach Your aims if You would not be willing to achieve them.
That’s why clarity is important. Get clarity about what it is You want based on what feels right for Your heart. It’s not worth doing in Your life what You actually don’t like, because the price You pay for wasted time is Your life – knowing that You could do something You like more, it could burn as a hell. Then try to find those who have done what You seek – try to find a role model, mentor. When I was at my lowest point, I found Sintija as my role model, hoping that someday I will be as pleasant as she is.

Because success means different things to different folks, at the end what matters is how You feel about Your results and current situation You are in. When You will follow Your heart and try Your best, then it is possible to be successful and the most important – happy.


Let’s stop here for a while. As I like to say – one step at a time. Before we continue here is a chance for You to think about what You like to do, what are Your interests and whether You are doing job You love or not? If You find any improvements – write them, if You find Yourself doing job You actually don’t love – start by thinking what You love and what would You like to achieve. That’s crucial.

Yours truly,

Every single day is a fight even now

Hey, mate!

As You noticed, before several years I faced some difficulties and now I’m trying to figure it out how it all happened and how my experience can improve someone’s life.
As You see from the headline, it doesn’t mean that I have no consequences nowadays just because I faced anorexia several years ago. It does mean that every single day is an amazing challenge for me even after 6 years. There is a huge difference between what I call amazing and a bit harder day. And it’s almost impossible to predict which of these days will be tommorow.
I can wake up smiling like a 6 years old boy who has got new toy car yesterday, however there are many days I would like to smash that car. It’s so frustrating to wake up and feel pain in my stomach, feel nervous and realize that I have a headache. Together it makes total weakness and I’m frustrating because I don’t know why I must feel this pain… Am I doing something wrong in my life? Am I hurting someone and this is a payback?
There are many days I can’t even move straight.. But as I meantioned above I have those amazing days and these are a days in which I try to make my life successful and try to help others. Even those painful days filled with weakness won’t stop me just because I always have a hope that there are persons whose life could be improved.. maybe in the way by sharing my personal experience.

In other words, don’t give up even if You have 7 or 10 painful days in a row.. You know that after there will be a day that can change your life and improve other’s. Just keep going! 🙂 At least You should try it.